I used to think couples that keep breaking up and getting back together aren’t fit for any romantic relationship. But Matthew and Dorothy are one of those pairs who have truly grown and display selflessness toward one another.

The young Catholics sat down at a quaint park in Westerville, Ohio to share very deep things about their past together. They were upfront about roadblocks many couples would refuse to reveal: Matthew wasn’t convinced Dorothy would pursue Jesus like he did, while Dorothy shared her frustrations about his back-and-forth attitude. Through their witnesses I could see there was a genuine respect each one had built for the other.

One of the emotional details of their story is that Matthew proposed to Dorothy at her late mother’s grave with all of her family members lined up, handing her roses as they walked to the tombstone. Rather than seeing death as the end, being Christian meant Dorothy knows her mother is still with her in a way, and that there was a way through the grief and loss.

In the same way I see the significance of their story is twofold: firstly, God holds such a good future for us it will look different than our human perspective can see, and so we have to open ourselves and grow into it; secondly, marriage happens only when we surrender to Jesus so that He can bring growth out of our lives—marriage just doesn’t work unless you know there is a Lover who pours into you two and shows you the path of love.

The culmination of Matthew and Dorothy’s surrender was receiving the gift of Holy Matrimony at Saint Catherine’s Church in Bexley, their reception capping the occasion right on campus.